I awoke at 7 AM, despite having no class or work until 4:30 PM, which I am skipping so I can drink beers in the parking lot. I couldn't sleep because today is like Third Christmas. (First Christmas = fantasy football draft day; Second Christmas = fantasy baseball draft day; Fourth Christmas = Christmas)
BYOB to the parking lot party, which starts around 5:45. Here is your opening day lineup:
1. Tom B- P
2. Tom J- OF
3. Larson- SS
4. Jake- 3B
5. Brent- 1B
6. Joe- OF
7. Colin- 2B
8. Derek- OF
9. Rookiepond- OF
10. Mike's sub- C
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Opening Day Haiku
Yearning not quenched with
Winter's worth of scotch and beer
I am whole again
Feel free to leave your own beautiful haiku in the comments
Monday, April 20, 2009
Monday, April 13, 2009
Welcome Back
Spring is finally upon us. Birds are fornicating with bees, Miken bats are being purchased amid a financial crisis, and the Wild Turkeys have come out of hibernation.
Our season begins a week from tomorrow with an exhibition game against the not-so-fearsome Silver Bullets. It should give us a chance to shake off some of the rust, break in the new Miken NRG 600 Pro Series bat, and drink Busch Lights in a parking lot while hiding from the MPD.
It feels good to post again. I have some content planned for the early days of the season, including updated career stats, an introduction of a new starting Turkey, and our very first Hall of Fame ballot.
See you at Park T on the 21st.
Our season begins a week from tomorrow with an exhibition game against the not-so-fearsome Silver Bullets. It should give us a chance to shake off some of the rust, break in the new Miken NRG 600 Pro Series bat, and drink Busch Lights in a parking lot while hiding from the MPD.
It feels good to post again. I have some content planned for the early days of the season, including updated career stats, an introduction of a new starting Turkey, and our very first Hall of Fame ballot.
See you at Park T on the 21st.
Monday, January 12, 2009
Baby on Board!
The latest news in the blogosphere is that Bob Mack is now an expecting father. His wife and he recently broke the news at a press conference. By a press conference, I mean I was drinking with Colin last week and I think he told me. Either way, YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST!! Unless you were drinking with Colin and I last week.
This potentially makes Bob the first father in Wild Turkey history.
It automatically makes Bob the most responsible Turkey. Here is a list of creatures I could not properly take care of:
-human child
-dog
-tropical fish
-plant
-flu virus
Congratulations to Bob and his blushing bride. If the child is a male, his future Turkey training will begin immediately by giving him one beer a day, which will eventually be expanded to two, and three, and so forth. Plus, I believe that is common practice in Bemidji anyway.
Thursday, December 4, 2008
Hot Stove Softball
It's been already been a cold, hard, softball-free winter. Let's take a look around the league to see if there are any signs of softball life.
Bob Mack is returning for the Turkeys' 2009 summer campaign, he announced through his agent, D. Scott Turnbull. The left-center fielder was considering a transfer to the Bemidji softball league, but ultimately decided on staying when he was told by "Dazzle Man" Dan Gladden that his skills may not translate to a foreign league. "I enjoy shooting things. I also enjoy playing for the Wild Turkeys. The Bemidji softball league offered me the opportunity to sit around a lot while drinking and shooting lots of things. My wife does not quite share my zest for sitting around, drinking, and shooting things, so we've decided to stay in Minnetonka," the press release read.
Elsewhere in the league, a number of Wild Turkeys have signed off-season contracts to play for the Tundra Turkeys of the St. Louis Park broomball league. This expansion team is fielding a squad chock full of rookies and non-hockey playing talent. There is already a showdown for the right to play goalie, with a shoot-off deciding the outcome. Look for manager Brent Wiessner to launch a Tundra Turkey blog early this winter. Also look for them to be drinking copious amounts of Irish coffees and losing copious amounts of games.
That's it for now. Registration for the 2009 season begins in February and two-a-days begin in March. See you then
Bob Mack is returning for the Turkeys' 2009 summer campaign, he announced through his agent, D. Scott Turnbull. The left-center fielder was considering a transfer to the Bemidji softball league, but ultimately decided on staying when he was told by "Dazzle Man" Dan Gladden that his skills may not translate to a foreign league. "I enjoy shooting things. I also enjoy playing for the Wild Turkeys. The Bemidji softball league offered me the opportunity to sit around a lot while drinking and shooting lots of things. My wife does not quite share my zest for sitting around, drinking, and shooting things, so we've decided to stay in Minnetonka," the press release read.
Elsewhere in the league, a number of Wild Turkeys have signed off-season contracts to play for the Tundra Turkeys of the St. Louis Park broomball league. This expansion team is fielding a squad chock full of rookies and non-hockey playing talent. There is already a showdown for the right to play goalie, with a shoot-off deciding the outcome. Look for manager Brent Wiessner to launch a Tundra Turkey blog early this winter. Also look for them to be drinking copious amounts of Irish coffees and losing copious amounts of games.
That's it for now. Registration for the 2009 season begins in February and two-a-days begin in March. See you then
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